Crime and Punishment
by Raexneol
Summary: In which Reno wreaks havoc upon Tseng's coffeepot, and Tseng responds accordingly. TsengReno, rated M for a reason, yo. ;D Yaoi, light bondage, some kink


Okay, so, this plot idea attacked me while I was sleeping and refused to leave me alone until I wrote it. So here it is. After three days of fucking slaving over this stupid thing, here's a nice, juicy lemon for you all. :D

Sorry the ending phails. I couldn't come up with a better one.

Warnings: Bondage, spanking, and general hardcore yaoi of the Reno persuasion. Do enjoy. Flames will be laughed at and shown to all my friends so they can laugh at them, too. Reviews will be loved like the children I'll never have. :D

I do not own Reno, Tseng, the idea of cutting out the pocket of your pants to masturbate in public, or Modeoheim. I do, however, own this idea.

* * *

Reno honestly knew that he was going to get in trouble that day. He had actually gone to work with the sole intent of pissing Tseng off. And who could blame him, really? It had been a slow week for the Turks, with the team stuck in their offices doing grunt work.

During these slow times, Tseng relied _heavily _on his coffee to get him through the day, and _anyone_ who touched or messed with the Commander's personal coffeepot was pretty much asking for an ass kicking.

It was with this knowledge that Reno had switched out Tseng's super expensive, highly caffeinated brew with cheap decaf.

It didn't take long for him to figure out that his higher-up had noticed the difference, either.

He was sitting at his desk while Rude was out making copies of some report or another, hand deep in the pocket of the cut out pocket of his uniform, preparing to relieve some of the boredom of the slow-as-hell business day. His head rested on his shockingly clean desk as his fingers flitted along his length, teasing himself, his eyes going half-mast and his teeth catching his lower lip. He wrapped his fingers around his hard cock, stroking lightly, not wanting to get there too quick, his thumb sliding slowly over the head, nail dipping into the small slit momentarily. Just as he began to release a moan, his office door slammed open and a mug of coffee was slammed down directly next to his head, spilling some of the scalding hot liquid on his neck. The redhead jumped, hand flying out of his pants inconspicuously.

"What the hell is this," Tseng growled. Reno blinked.

"Am I supposed to answer that? Because that sounded more like a statement than a question, yo."

"What the fuck did you do to my coffee, Reno?" Tseng hissed, grabbing a completely unfazed Reno's collar. The redhead smirked.

"I did you the favor of making it this morning, Boss. Didn't know it'd getcha so fired up," he said, hardly able to keep the chuckle out of his voice. Tseng closed his eyes and counted to ten. He could hardly kill the insolent man here; it'd get blood all over Rude's work, and that would be a shame. And a bloody pain in the ass to clean, pardoning the pun.

"It's decaf," he stated calmly.

"Yep!" Reno chirruped brightly, folding his hands behind his head. "Thought you needed a downer 'stead of an upper today. No need to thank me, yo." He smirked haughtily at Tseng, loving that he could see the Commander get more and more pissed off by the second. His smirk promptly disappeared, however, when Tseng hauled him up by his shirt, dragging him out of his shared office. As his superior pulled him down the hall, they passed Rude, who honestly didn't look surprised at the sight. Reno flashed him a smile and a thumbs-up before getting thrown into the break room. As the redhead caught himself on the table, Tseng locked the door, the click of the catch reverberating ominously throughout the room.

Reno turned around, suddenly nervous. There were no potential witnesses here… When his eyes found Tseng, he winced beneath the withering glare he had trained on him. His eyes widened as the older man pulled an E-Mag rod out of nowhere.

"L-look, Tseng--I mean, Commander--I didn't mean to--"

"Yes, you did. You just didn't mean to get caught, am I correct?" Tseng purred dangerously, flicking the switch to turn the weapon on. Reno gulped, tried to back away, and made a soft, distressed noise as he found his escape blocked by the table. However, though he knew he was likely in mortal danger, he couldn't help but find the peril he was in… arousing.

His dick, which had gone half flaccid, now stood at full attention, a fact which Reno noticed and tried to hide. Luck, however, seemed to have decided that this was the day she was going to get her kicks, so before Reno could pull some ninja move and get the hell outta there, Tseng roughly kicked his ankles, forcing his legs apart. As the Wutai man stepped between Reno's spread legs, the threat on his lips died before it could be voiced. A slender eyebrow was arched.

"Don't tell me you're getting off to this," Tseng growled, the E-Mag rod inches from Reno's side crackling audibly. The redhead gave his higher-up a shaky grin.

"Nah. That's a penny roll in my pocket, yo," he joked weakly. Tseng's flat look erased his grin, however, and he gulped as his commander's hand reached for his pocket.

"Really. Well, then, you won't mind if I--" Before Reno could even think to protest, Tseng had shoved his hand into his pants, both eyebrows lifting when his hand came into direct contact with Reno's hard cock.

The redhead stiffened--in both senses of the word--and bit his lower lip hard in an effort to silence a moan. "Tseng--" he began, but Tseng squeezed him hard and Reno decided that it would be better to just stop talking.

"So you weren't asleep when I came in," Tseng mused, pumping his employee's length a few times, watching the younger's eyes go glassy, Mako infused turquoise darkening lustfully. He felt his own erection suddenly and shifted away from Reno slightly in an attempt to hide his arousal. He was _straight_, after all, and despite the fact that Reno was pretty much sex on legs, he _would not_ give in.

Damnit.

The redhead, however, seemed to have conflicting interests. He reached down between them, cupping Tseng's hard-on through his pants and squeezing tight. He wore a feral smirk that Tseng decided he wanted nothing more than to wipe off of his pretty face. As the redhead kneaded the bulge in his superior's slacks, Tseng wrapped Reno's long ponytail around his fist and yanked hard.

Now, of all the reactions Tseng was expecting, one of them was most certainly not the loud moan that the redhead loosed, accompanied by a sharp jerk of his hips. He found himself groaning softly along with Reno, his hips almost imperceptibly thrusting into the Turk's cupped hand.

Allowing himself no time to think things through for once, Tseng pulled Reno off of the table and turned him around, grinding his clothed and now throbbing erection against the redhead's ass with enough force to move the table, groaning in appreciation at the much needed friction. Reno hissed and pressed back against him, then grinned and looked back over his shoulder at Tseng.

"Are you going to punish me now, Boss?" he purred, his lust-darkened eyes sparkling mischievously. His grin widened as Tseng loosed his die, pulling it slack enough to slide over his head, slip knot still intact.

"Hold this for me," Tseng said, sliding the tie over the other Turk's shock of red hair, making sure the material slid into his mouth, pulling the knot taut and effectively gagging him.

Reno's sea green eyes widened almost comically before he chuckled, muttering something that could've been, "Kinky son of a bitch," and probably was. Tseng paid him no mind, taking the liberty of removing Reno's belt, wrapping the tough leather around his arms, starting at the elbow and securely buckling it at the wrists in front of him. The redhead gave a muffled groan, leaning over and spreading his legs further. Tseng yanked Reno's pants down, then stepped back and contemplated.

While the redhead made quite the lovely sight, Tseng wasn't going to give in to his obvious desire just yet. Reno did, after all, sabotage his drink… On purpose, no less. And his punishment was cutting in to company time, which, in effect, took away from what little personal time he got.

He pulled his own belt from around his waist, grabbing both ends in one hand and snapping it loudly. Reno jumped, then looked over his shoulder, giving an excited shudder when he saw Tseng eying the material thoughtfully. The brunet looked up when he heard Reno's soft whimper.

"You know…" he mused, "As sure as I am of the validity of your repentance, I'm not quite sure that fucking you is the best punishment." He grinned as he watched another shiver wrack the lanky man's body, stepping to him and running the very tips of his fingers along the smooth skin of his ass. He pulled his hand back and brought it down again hard, the sound of the slap reverberating through the room, amplifying it.

Reno gasped at the sharp pain, his cock throbbing painfully, leaking copious amounts of precum. Tseng yanked his head back by the hair again, bringing the belt down hard this time, the sound of leather meeting flesh accompanied by a cry of what sounded suspiciously like, "Yes!" Tseng's grin turned sadistic, his blows coming harder as he leaned down to purr, "Who's the kinky son of a bitch, again?"

Reno moaned loudly, his short nails scrabbling at the table as he sought purchase. He felt a familiar heat in his lower belly, and it only took a few more whips to make him cry out loudly, emptying himself all over the underside of the table. At his cry, his commander dropped both the belt and his pants, shoving two of his fingers into Reno's mouth and commanding, "Suck." When Reno refused to comply, Tseng grabbed a fistful of the crazy mass of spikes on the top of his head, hauling him back far enough to hiss, "You want me to stop now? Because I can, and you'll be stuck with a hard on all day, and you'd better _believe_ I'll make sure you don't jack off til your happy ass gets off work."

That set the redhead to sucking, if only because he knew that Tseng would actually do it. He dragged his tongue along the underside of Tseng's fingers, keeping eye contact with his boss as he began slowly bobbing his head, sucking on the digits like he wanted to do to another part of Tseng's anatomy. Not that every bob of his head, every drag of his tongue, and every centimeter more he took wasn't going there anyway, a fact which did not go unnoticed by Reno. As he began bobbing his head faster, he groaned, grinding against his superior, shamelessly wanton.

Tseng moaned softly in response, swearing under his breath and pulling his fingers out of Reno's mouth, shoving two unceremoniously into him and scissoring them. Reno hissed in pain, shying away from the intruding appendages, moaning, "Jeezus, you trying to fuckin break somethin' there, Tseng? That hurts, yo!" around his gag. Tseng silenced him by hooking his fingers, brushing against that certain bundle of nerves deep inside him. This time his moan was a moan of pleasure.

The brunet cocked an inquisitive eyebrow at the sudden change, retracing his steps and stroking that spot a bit harder, watching in grudging fascination as Reno's back arched, feeling the redhead impale himself harder on his fingers. Deciding that he had had enough prep, he pulled his fingers out and placed the head of his cock at his entrance, watching Reno's back stiffen.

"Tseng--" his almost-protest was cut short as Tseng pressed _hard_, and all that Reno could manage was a whimpered "Fuck…" as he was opened wide. Tseng hissed in pleasure as Reno's heat enveloped him, the only coherent thought making it through the haze of ecstasy being that he definitely needed to look into getting more male bed partners.

When he finally rested completely inside Reno, he paused, not so much to give the redhead time to adjust as to revel in the unbelievably tight heat around him, trying hard to keep his orgasm in check. Reno lay his head on the table to hide the tears that had gathered in his eyes, hard and throbbing all over again despite the pain. As the seconds passed by and he grew more accustomed to the brunet's length inside him, he lifted his head again, turning to look over his shoulder at the older male, who, as of yet, had still not moved.

Tseng caught his look and raised an eyebrow, getting the hint when Reno pulled away slightly and thrust back onto him. He grabbed the redhead's hips with bruising force, pulling almost completely out of him before snapping his pelvis forward again and burying himself balls deep inside his employee, grinning at the raw moan that tore its way out of Reno's throat. He angled his hips just so, and his next thrust made Reno's back arch and his eyes widen in shock, this moan much louder and more desperate.

Tseng's thrusts began coming harder and more demanding after that, the force with which he pounded into Reno moving the table with every meeting of skin. The redhead's fingers scrabbled at the surface of the table as he threw his head back, crying out with every thrust, pressing back against Tseng and all but begging to be fucked harder. Tseng complied, grabbing a fistful of Reno's hair again, pulling his head back and throwing what little rhythm he started with to the wind, brutally pounding into the redhead as he leaned down to suck and bite at his exposed neck.

Reno's cries escalated into near-screams of ecstasy, tears sliding unbidden down his cheeks, hair sticking to his sweaty forehead and back. He felt the hand that gripped his hip slide around to his weeping dick, grabbing him and stroking quickly, jacking him off with less rhythm than he was being fucked. He tried to stifle his cries by biting down on the tie, but Tseng nipped his ear, murmuring, "There'll be none of that. If you're going to cum, you're going to let the whole department know who's making you." That said, he pulled the tie out of his mouth, demanding, "Now scream."

However, the redhead seemed to lose his nerve, biting his lip and shaking his head, his body seizing up in preparation for his orgasm. Tseng brought a quick end to that, though, grabbing the base of his cock, and squeezing, forcibly holding his orgasm at bay. Reno cried out in dismay, a few drops of cum bubbling out of the tip and sliding tantalizingly down his length.

"I think you misunderstood me, Reno," Tseng said conversationally, stilling his hips with no little amount of willpower. "I specifically told you to scream when you came for me. Now, that's a fucking order, got it?" he growled, thrusting into him harder than before, slamming into his prostate with every snap of his hips, his hand flying over Reno's cock.

The redhead seemed to get the message this time, throwing his head back and screaming breathlessly as he was fucked mercilessly. Finally, his body seized up again and he screamed "Tseng!!" as he came hard, his seed spilling over his superior's hand and shooting onto his chest. As his body tensed, Tseng bit down on his shoulder hard enough to draw blood and he shot off his load deep inside his employee. The two collapsed bonelessly onto the table, panting hard.

"Christ…" Reno groaned appreciatively, never able to keep quiet for long. "Fuck, Tseng, if I knew that fuckin with your coffee would get me that, I'da done it a long time ago."

"It would usually get you bathroom duty. I suppose today was an exception," Tseng grunted, sliding out of Reno grudgingly and pulling his pants back up. He left out the fact that he had been harboring the desire to fuck his employee for a while now, of course. Reno chuckled.

"Glad I caught you on a good day, then."

"Don't let it happen again, understood?"

"Aye aye, yo."

"Good. Now, clean your mess up and make me some coffee," Tseng ordered, leaving the break room and a gaping Reno, straightening his tie as he walked back to his office.

Grumbling and sore, Reno pulled his pants back up, grimacing and limping over to the coffeepot to make his superior a proper cup of coffee.

* * *

The following week found Tseng in the break room for the first time in four days. There had been an outbreak of monsters in Modeoheim and the team had been called in to take care of it.

_After three long days of search and destroy, it's nice to be back to the mundane, oddly enough… _He mused, raising his mug of coffee up to his lips and taking a sip. The liquid never made it down his throat, however, being instead promptly spit out into the sink. His eyes screamed death as he stalked down the hall toward Reno's office, coffee mug clutched in hand.

The redhead smirked as he entered and slammed his mug down on the desk again. "Heya, bossman," he said, crossing his arms behind his head in a repeat of the week before. "Coffee okay?"

Tseng took a breath. Held it. Counted to ten. Turned and walked out of the office, then returned mere moments later, a toothbrush in his hand. Reno's eyebrows lifted.

"A toothbrush? Kinky," he purred, taking the instrument and waggling his eyebrows. Tseng smiled.

"Oh, yes. Terribly. How would you like to spend the rest of the day on your knees, Reno?"

Reno smirked. "I'd love to, as it were."

His commander's smile turned sinister.

"Good."

* * *

Five hours later found Reno still on his hands and knees, scrubbing the _third_ bathroom on their floor spotless with only a toothbrush and a bar of soap. "Can't believe the bastard actually gave me bathroom duty..."

* * *

And there it is. The end! Reviews make me happy! And everyone loves a happy me!! So review! :D


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